


In the arms of an angel

by joeyrz



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: M/M, Pre-Slash, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2001-09-29
Updated: 2001-09-29
Packaged: 2017-10-17 07:52:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/174575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joeyrz/pseuds/joeyrz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Not everyone deals...</p>
            </blockquote>





	In the arms of an angel

**Author's Note:**

> Ever heard Sarah Mclahan’s “Angel”? I did today, for real, reading lyrics and all... I don’t recommend it if you’re already feeling angsty...

Tara watched the scene before her unfold detachedly. They’ve been keeping close tabs on each other since Buffy sacrificed herself for Dawn, and Anya’s death later in the hospital. Two days ago, was the last time they had seen Xander, and had gotten deeply worried. He had been so... hollow after what happened.

Willow, Dawn and her had gone to Xander’s new apartment only to find it stripped bare of everything, except the appliances. They found no note, no clue as to where the broken young man had gone. Giles and Willow immediately found a spell to locate Xander.

By the time they narrowed the search to a hotel a few miles outside Sunnydale, Spike arrived to the Magic Box. Assured that Spike could scent out Xander in a hotel, they piled up into Willow’s Highlander, and drove off.

Sitting next to Spike, Tara noticed how tense the vampire was, his jaw clenched and ready-to-bolt posture. Somewhere, in the back of their minds, they knew, Spike knew, what they’d find, yet they clung onto that bit of hope that they weren’t too late.

Willow pulled into an empty parking space and unlocked the doors. As soon as Spike opened his door, he looked up sharply and jumped out of the SUV, then ran to one of the farthest doors of the complex. He kicked the door open, and to our despair, entered without having to invited in.

We ran to catch up, but came up short at the doorway.

The small radio was playing on one of those soft rock stations, the curtains were pulled shut and a few boxes littered around the cold hotel room, and Tara could see that each had one of their names written on them.

And in the center of the room, Spike cradled the still body of their friend.

Willow ran to their side, dropped to her knees and shook Xander’s body roughly. I vaguely registered her words over the sobs of Dawn and Giles, and they heart breaking, hair raising wailing that Spike was making as he pried Xander from Willow and pulled the body close to him, wrapping his arms tightly around him.

The radio changed songs, and I wondered what god was playing a sick joke on us, when I heard the song that came on. As the chorus started, and Sarah Mclachlan sang about arms of an angel, I waved my hand angrily, making the radio fly through the room and crash into the wall, breaking into non-song-playing pieces.

Spike’s blond hair and insistent wails looked too much like a guardian angel mourning the loss of their charge to her.

Yet Xander won’t be able to find the comfort his arms offered.

end

Spend all your time waiting  
For that second chance  
For a break that would make it okay  
There's always one reason  
To feel not good enough  
And it's hard at the end of the day  
I need some distraction  
Oh beautiful release  
Memory seeps from my veins  
Let me be empty  
And weightless and maybe  
I'll find some peace tonight

In the arms of an angel  
Fly away from here  
From this dark cold hotel room  
And the endlessness that you fear  
You are pulled from the wreckage  
Of your silent reverie  
You're in the arms of the angel  
May you find some comfort there

So tired of the straight line  
And everywhere you turn  
There's vultures and thieves at your back  
And the storm keeps on twisting  
You keep on building the lie  
That you make up for all that you lack  
It don't make no difference  
Escaping one last time  
It's easier to believe in this sweet madness oh  
This glorious sadness that brings me to my knees

In the arms of an angel  
Fly away from here  
From this dark cold hotel room  
And the endlessness that you fear  
You are pulled from the wreckage  
Of your silent reverie  
You're in the arms of the angel  
May you find some comfort there  
You're in the arms of the angel  
May you find some comfort here


End file.
